with vigor and rigor

understand to be understood.
for a lot of people, seeking to understand is something so easy to forget.

my problem is the latter--seeking to be understood.
i'm not saying i understand everyone perfectly, but i am not having a hard time understanding people. so much so that i tend to get confused on which of two radically opposing ideas should i believe in and die for. putting myself in their shoes, open-mindedness and all that sap i consciously do as i listen to people from anywhere. it's not a problem yet, this whole oh-my-crap-they-both-are-right-but-only-one-never-both thing. maybe soon

right now the problem is i can't get my messages across so easily, beautifully, well. i almost always drown people with the manner, the sudden sign of puberty, the hand movements and not my point. which is sad. because although i do am trying to put equal emphasis on message and manner and method and whatnot, i seem to be losing sight of my point... really.

which is not totally sad, 'cause at the end of all this hubbub where i actually figure out the solution to this problem, i'd come across with another communication problem. and this of course is ultimately good, it prevents complacency. something so convenient for now but only for now

that we are unperturbed, unmoved, complacent, too comfortable is something that we should all always always avoid. whether it's a getting-the-message-across problem, an oh-my-crap-she-is-with-someone-else problem, a what-a-tiny-president problem, it is this unflurried state that would ensure any of these problems would never never be solved. for it devitalizes us. we lose vigor and rigor

words we better hold dear

lisnin to Jonz in My Bonz - D'Angelo
sortof readin national internal revenue code of the philippines
feelin kinda dissatisfied and happy that i am dissatisfied